~ Taken from Vincent Cheung, The Sermon on the Mount. ~
“It has been said, ‘Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.’ But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits adultery.”
Since Jesus proceeds to discuss divorce, it may appear that he is moving on to the next subject, but several indications suggest that verses 31 and 32 are a continuation or extension of what he started in the previous verses.
First, the beginning of verse 31 in fact contains the Greek connective de, which can be translated as “also,” “and,” or “moreover.” It is often unexpressed in English, so that it is absent from the KJV and NIV, but it shows up in the NASB, so that it reads, “And it was said, ‘Whoever sends his wife away, let him give her a certificate of divorce.'” Second, whereas the other five sections or examples all begin with “You have heard that it was said” (v. 21, 27, 33, 38, 43), verse 31 begins with the words, “It has been said.” This could mean that he is citing a new quotation without starting a new topic. Third, although the subject seems to be about divorce, the sin under discussion is still “adultery” (v. 32), which is the topic of the previous passage (v. 27-30). Fourth, after this passage on divorce, Jesus begins the next example by saying, “again” (v. 33), which probably signals to the audience that he is starting a new topic. Therefore, it seems that verse 31 does not begin an entirely new topic, but follows what Jesus has just said about adultery (v. 27-30).
Now, it has been said, “Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce” (v. 31). This alludes to how the Jews understand Deuteronomy 24:1-4, which reads:
If a man marries a woman who becomes displeasing to him because he finds something indecent about her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, and if after she leaves his house she becomes the wife of another man, and her second husband dislikes her and writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, or if he dies, then her first husband, who divorced her, is not allowed to marry her again after she has been defiled. That would be detestable in the eyes of the LORD. Do not bring sin upon the land the LORD your God is giving you as an inheritance.
In Matthew 5:31, Jesus does not directly cite this passage, but he refers to the Jews’ interpretation of it.
First, even if the passage really says, “Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce,” it would not mean that God approves of divorce, or that he regards it as insignificant. In some areas, convicted sex offenders are required to register with the local police – that is, “If you are a sex offender, then you must register.” But this does not mean that the government approves of the sex crimes as long as the offenders register with the police. The requirement is intended to protect the people from sex crimes. Likewise, even if God’s law says, “If you divorce your wife, then you must write her a certificate of divorce,” it does not mean that he regards divorce as good or neutral. Rather, the custom is most likely in place for the benefit of the “victim” in a divorce, which would almost certainly be the woman in those days.
In fact, Moses does not command the man to write a certificate of divorce, but he assumes the practice and mentions it in passing as he makes his point. The thrust of this passage is not immediately obvious because of its numerous details and qualifications, but if we remove most of the clauses for the moment, we see that it reads, “If a man…sends [his wife] from his house…and…she becomes the wife of another man…[he] is not allowed to marry her again.” That is, “If you divorce your wife, and if she marries another man, then you must not marry her again.” A man must not remarry his former wife once she has married a second man, even if the second man dies or divorces her. This, and not the certificate, is the point.
Among other reasons, this regulation is probably meant to prevent hasty divorce and wife swapping. If the law permits men to marry, divorce, and remarry whomever and whenever they wish, then the men could practice wife swapping – marrying, divorcing, exchanging, and then remarrying the women. They could technically remain innocent from adultery, since each man would be married to the woman that he has during the time that he has her. God regards this and other such practices as “detestable.”
However, rather than acknowledging the obvious meaning of the command, the Jews have made it into a law about writing out the certificate. In Matthew 19, the Pharisees come to test Jesus, and ask, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?” (v. 3). When Jesus, in effect, answers in the negative (v. 4-6), they ask, “Why then…did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?” Thus the Pharisees indeed interpret Deuteronomy 24:1-4 as granting them permission to divorce “for any and every reason,” so long as they write out a certificate of divorce. But the thrust of Deuteronomy 24:1-4 is to decree a prohibition related to remarriage, and not a permission related to divorce.
Against their distortion of God’s law, Jesus declares, “But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits adultery” (Matthew 5:32). Since what we call the exception clause (“except for marital unfaithfulness”) is exactly that – it states an exception – it would be helpful to first read the verse without it, so that we could focus on the main point, and after that return to it. Without the exception clause, the verse reads, “But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife…causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits adultery.”
The statement declares a general disapproval of divorce, and warns about its consequences. Although the verse is clear, we could derive a fuller understanding of Christ’s teaching on divorce if we also look at what he says about it elsewhere.
First, there are the verses in which Christ offers a positive statement about marriage, which also help us understand his teaching on divorce:
“Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate….Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning.” (Matthew 19:4-6, 8)
Marriage is not a human invention, but it is a creation ordinance initiated by God. Since it is God who joins together the man and the woman in a marriage, only God can properly dissolve it, and he does this only by the death of at least one of the two. This is an established teaching, so that Paul uses it as an illustration when he makes a point about something else:
For example, by law a married woman is bound to her husband as long as he is alive, but if her husband dies, she is released from the law of marriage. So then, if she marries another man while her husband is still alive, she is called an adulteress. But if her husband dies, she is released from that law and is not an adulteress, even though she marries another man. (Romans 7:2-3)
A marriage is properly dissolved only by the death of at least one of the two. Paul does not say that the woman commits adultery if she marries another man without first getting a divorce, but he says that she commits adultery if she marries another man if the original husband is “still alive.” Elsewhere Paul writes, “A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives” (1 Corinthians 7:39) – not just as long as they do not get a divorce. A divorce does not dissolve a marriage, but only death does. If you are married now, even if you divorce your spouse before a human court, you are still not allowed to marry again. If you marry again, then you commit adultery, and God will hold you accountable.
Let us turn to the parallel passages where Jesus describes what happens when people divorce their spouses. Again, for now we will remove the exception clause from each verse where it appears:
“But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife…causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits adultery.” (Matthew 5:32)
“I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife…and marries another woman commits adultery.” (Matthew 19:9)
“Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her. And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery.” (Mark 10:11-12)
“Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery, and the man who marries a divorced woman commits adultery.” (Luke 16:18)
Thus when a divorce occurs, these people will end up committing adultery:
- The man who divorces, and then remarries.
- The woman who divorces, and then remarries.
- The man who marries the divorced woman.
- The woman who marries the divorced man.[1]
So we summarize Christ’s teaching this way: “It is God who joins together a man and a woman in marriage, so that only God can and may dissolve it by the death of at least one of the two; therefore, do not divorce at all.”
We see that this is the correct understanding of Christ’s teaching by noting how Paul restates it to the Corinthians: “To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife” (1 Corinthians 7:10-11). Although he is the one writing to the Corinthians, he says, “not I, but the Lord,” because he is merely restating what Jesus says in the Gospels.
What Paul says is identical to what Jesus teaches, and is summarized as follows:
- A wife must not divorce her husband.
- A husband must not divorce his wife.
- If they do separate,[2] then they must remain unmarried.
- Otherwise, they must be reconciled to one another.
Christ’s teaching on divorce is such that the disciples say to him, “If this is the situation between a husband and wife, it is better not to marry” (Matthew 19:10). This strong reaction from the disciples further confirms our understanding, that Christ intends to assert a strict view on marriage, divorce, and remarriage.
Indeed, the Bible’s teaching on marriage, divorce, and remarriage is so strict that, although we must not back away from marriage, we must not rush into it and think that we may always get a divorce and remarry if it does not work out. Since God says that he hates divorce (Malachi 2:16), we must adopt the same attitude.
Let us return to the exception clause. Since the exception clause is an exception clause, it is not even mentioned in the parallel verses in Mark and Luke, and Paul also omits it when he restates Christ’s teaching. An exception is an exception – it is not something that should usually happen. This is important, because wicked men and women, including those who claim to be Christians, would seize on any provision for an exception to distort it and universalize it, to broaden what is supposed to be a narrow allowance.
Only Matthew includes the exception clause. The two verses in which it appears are as follows:
“But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits adultery.” (Matthew 5:32)
“I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery.” (Matthew 19:9)
Jesus teaches that a person is not permitted to divorce for any reason, but he offers one exception, and only one very narrow and specific exception – namely, when there is “marital unfaithfulness.” Even so, one is not commanded to divorce the unfaithful spouse, but merely permitted to do so.[3] Then, although many biblical scholars argue that a divorce caused by marital unfaithfulness properly ends the marriage, so that at least the innocent party is free to remarry, others have convincingly argued otherwise, so that even the innocent one must remain unmarried, or be reconciled with the spouse (1 Corinthians 7:11).[4]
The Pharisees approach God’s commandments with the intent to define how far they can go without committing sin. With this attitude, they invariably twist and distort God’s law to make more room for their wickedness. If a person is obsessed with finding out how he can get out of a marriage, then he is already guilty of subverting God’s commandments. Instead, based on the understanding that marriage is to endure for life, he should actively pursue ways to solidify, improve, and repair his marriage.
Just as Jesus is not limiting his ethical teaching to those examples that he cites in the Sermon on the Mount, rebellious men do not limit themselves to distorting God’s commandments on marriage. For example, many theologians spend their time arguing for the minimum of what it takes to become a Christian, or to obtain salvation. They ask, “What is the minimum of what a person must believe to receive salvation? What is the least that one must do? How sinful and corrupt can a person be in his lifestyle, and still be called a Christian?” This is not the kind of ministry that honors Christ, who says, “Go and make disciples…teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you” (Matthew 28:19-20).
Many who claim to be Christians often divorce one another for almost any reason, and their churches do not stop them. In some congregations, the members have divorced and remarried so often that, in effect, they have been swapping spouses with one another and with the world. They commit adultery with one another, divorce their spouses, and then marry one another. After a while, they cheat again, divorce again, and remarry again. God detests this abomination. In contrast, if we truly follow Jesus Christ, then we must practice and teach what he commands. Marriage is for life, and there is to be no divorce at all.
[1] The fourth proposition is the only one not directly stated in these verses, but if the man who divorces and then remarries commits adultery, then it is necessarily true that the woman who marries such a man also commits adultery. The fourth proposition is true for the same reason that the third proposition is true.
[2] Paul is probably referring to a separation that occurs when one of the two has committed fornication; otherwise, he is assuming that one might separate in disobedience to Christ’s teaching.
[3] Some have argued with some skill that what is translated “marital unfaithfulness” refers only to gross and extreme perversion (such as incest), and that alone is legitimate grounds for divorce. See J. Carl Laney, The Divorce Myth; Bethany House, 1981.
[4] See David J. Engelsma, Better to Marry; Reformed Free Publishing Association, 1993.