Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. (Ephesians 5:22–25)
God has established order in the family and in the church. He has assigned authority to men in these contexts, and this is not negotiable for those who claim to believe the Bible. Authority itself is good, because it reflects the order that God has built into creation and redemption. However, authority is only righteous when exercised in the way God commands. The standard is Christ. His headship over the church is the model for a husband’s headship over his wife, and for elders in the church over the congregation. Christ governs in a way that serves, sanctifies, and strengthens the church.
Christ’s leadership produces life. His authority is inseparable from his sacrifice. He does not oppress the church or exploit her for his own comfort. He works to present her holy, spotless, and glorious. When the Bible tells men to exercise authority over women, it is not giving them permission to satisfy their egos or to dominate for personal gain. It is commanding them to take responsibility for the spiritual welfare of those under their care, even at the cost of their own comfort and life.
In practice, churches that uphold the biblical teaching about male authority often carry it further than Scripture does. They attach extra rules, restrictions, and attitudes that serve themselves rather than Christ. This produces a culture of control and exclusion. It becomes an environment where men use their position to advance personal preference and to preserve status, rather than to advance the holiness and usefulness of the people they lead. When this happens, what remains is not biblical authority, but a counterfeit.
Oppression shrinks those under authority, while true leadership causes them to grow in faith and fruitfulness. Oppression fosters insecurity and dependence, while true leadership equips and strengthens. When leaders suppress gifts and limit participation, they weaken the entire body of Christ. They prevent the church from receiving the benefit of what God has given to all his people.
The authority God gives in the family and in the church is aimed at producing holiness, faith, and fruitfulness. Men in these roles will give an account to Christ for how they have used the authority entrusted to them. It is not enough to maintain control or to demand respect. The question will be whether their leadership advanced the spiritual life and effectiveness of those they led.
Women in the church are called to follow God’s order, but this does not mean they are spiritual dependents, unable to think, believe, or act in ways that advance the kingdom. Women can learn theology just as men can. Mary sat at the feet of Jesus to learn, and Jesus affirmed that she had chosen the better portion. Priscilla, along with her husband Aquila, instructed Apollos in the way of God more accurately. The ability to understand doctrine and to teach it is not limited to men.
Women can have faith for miracles just as men can. The woman with the issue of blood believed that touching the edge of Jesus’ garment would heal her, and she received exactly what she believed. The Syrophoenician woman refused to be turned away and obtained deliverance for her daughter. Martha believed that Jesus could have prevented her brother’s death, and she confessed that he is the Christ, the Son of God. God honors faith wherever it is found, and he responds to it without regard for gender. Women can also proclaim the gospel, even to men. The first announcement of the resurrection came from women. They delivered the message to the apostles themselves.
When men in leadership suppress these realities, they are not preserving biblical order. They are denying what God has revealed in Scripture and what he has done in history. They are acting as if their personal rules can improve upon God’s word. They are treating authority as a personal possession rather than as a trust from God.
Leadership in the church and in the home must recognize and develop the faith of those under its care. Men are called to teach women, but also to listen when God speaks through them. They are called to guide women toward maturity in Christ, not to keep them in spiritual infancy. This means encouraging them to learn, to believe, to speak, and to act as full members of the body of Christ.
Leaders who use authority to belittle or control will face judgment. God has already spoken against shepherds who feed themselves instead of the flock. In Ezekiel 34, he condemns those who rule harshly and brutally. In Luke 11, Jesus rebukes the religious leaders for loading people with burdens they cannot carry while refusing to lift a finger to help. Such leadership is a disgrace to God’s name and a direct violation of his command.
A healthy church culture will reflect the pattern of Christ’s leadership. Authority will be exercised for the benefit of those under it. Women will be valued for their faith, their gifts, and their contributions to the mission of the church. The order God has established will be maintained, but it will be filled with the life and freedom that his order is meant to produce. The church will become a place where every member is equipped and encouraged to serve according to God’s calling, without the artificial barriers that human pride invents.
Men in positions of authority should examine themselves. Are they using their role to advance the holiness and faith of those they lead? Are they following the example of Christ, who gave himself up for the church? Are they producing a culture where women are strengthened in their faith and usefulness, or one where they are weakened and silenced?
Christ loves the church and gave himself for her. He exercises authority in a way that leads to holiness, fruitfulness, and glory. Those who lead in his name must do the same. Anything else is a rejection of his example and a misuse of the authority he has given. The church does not need men who cling to their position for their own sake. It needs men who understand that authority is a means to serve, to teach, to strengthen, and to present the people of God complete in Christ.